black t shirt|
I am the police state you never imagined
encompassing your perspective in every dark alley
I WAIT FOR YOU as you run,
your heart beating with a terror
that I increasingly and methodically induce
Flashing bright lights overtake you with
The siren call of fascist male authority
Your slender gazelle legs only animal prey
Hunted in the night everywhere you move
Your free will itself is negated
Every choice you consider
Rendered null and invalid like a cheap coin
Meaningless currency through my constant dominion
Over you
Your boca mouth your boca raton was a gift of mine
Don’t you recall you never owned your teeth
I did
I am the police state
your childish tiny teeth likes pearlzs
are in my black gloved hand
as I wait for you to enter the bear trap again
to surrender your legs to me AS I RELEASE YOU
I will never let go of your beating heart
I will never let go of you.
In the office I wait for you as you begin your day
Switching on your computer I lie like a phantom
under the technical shadows, concealed with my authority
your every mouse move your every letter or number touched
is underscored revealed on a mirror image reality
I am looking at you
Screaming your name on your innocent screen I warn you
Of your security transgressions against the state
I track your cell phone calls while listening in
as the employer you trust
and the father you never knew
Sometimes I withhold your paychecks for good reason
I watch you as you pick up your scattered pennies
On the floor as I know you will
Spend them to get away from me
I am the actual police and can arrest you in the office
I am the police state and I WILL OVERTAKE YOU
Your journey will never lead you away from me
At home I have set out our slim white wooden chair
You remember our white chair with slats, don’t you?
Telling you ordering you to lose the weight that
Makes sitting in this chair so tight and uncomfortable
For our much too well-rounded young hips and thighs
not like a boy’s slim hips more ideal than yours
You will eat only jello for one week but you can pick the flavor
Darling daughter, red or yellow jello? Which will suffice?
You will eat the jello until the weight is gone
and we will be free again!
You will sit comfortably in the white wooden chair
You WILL do this I demand I order you to do it
YOU WILL OBEY ME because
I AM THE POLICE STATE AND I AM YOUR FATHER
I am under your feet as you walk and I am over your head
Looking down and around through internet surveillance
I can see you as you relax
I wait like a cat in the black night and may appear
in the bright blue sky of dawn as a friend
Passing you in a crowd unseen
Expecting you to know me when the time arrives
No matter that I have not spoken to you over the years
You must know me because I am the police state
I am the policeman and I am the police state
I am every sinner you ever knew I am every thought
you ever discarded like rumpled pieces of paper
in forgotten trash cans along the way
I have collected your insights even your throwaways
and wait to find a way
To harm you
To love you
To harm you again like before
I am the silver SS guard
The Matador you know and desire
With silver taps on my black shoes, Desiree
While I love you wearing my silver black gestapo hat
My black leather gloves folded on the table
My creased brown slacks or black with a brown belt
My businessman’s tan briefcase full of unfinished work
I glance quickly in your innocent eyes full of fear
As I stride aggressively through our locked door
holding the only set of keys
that the father threw to the daughter
My black raincoat is well-fitted on my frame
And swirls around me like an impending storm
A terrifying wind tunnel with leaves blowing upwards
Strangling vines adorn the cloth of my coat
A black Madonna speaks in a whisper
While the sewing kit has real colored thread and buttons
A nascent ray of the sunlight unvarnished that shone once
I polish the silver shoes of reality with my shoe man’s shoeshine cloth
unwanted imagery for women disappears through fair metaphors
as I confidently snap my sparkling leather gloves
for another cloudy day as the Police State
an ambiguous at best reality denied
It was a circumfit joining of the pipe organ
the pipes themselves
were the organ’s organs
and were playing the organ
the coffins were tight and unfitting of my personage
I choked until I ran closely with the wind the away wind
I simply flew away as an unknown witch not a famous one
In the sixties-style folk song in which I simply died as a singer
the studio didn’t like my work
but who cares about their despair?
the beauty of it is I am free from the ignominy
although it was an origination of the excised metaphor
of a spider’s head
they forced me to choose an insect
my father said the SS was never my reference
adding I am the police state
and I will rise from my grave to avenge Patricia
my own order as my child
I ask how the hell did the death’s head come to be my reference?
but isn’t a daughter always the father’s own order
his beloved child
his legacy
and his hope?
write by Christabel